The Crappy Cliff

"Greetings and Salutations! I am your host, MePhone4, and this is Inanimate Insanity!"

"The Crappy Cliff" is the first episode of Inanimate Insanity and the overall series. It was originally released on April 1, 2011. The episode was removed and promptly re-uploaded on September 14, 2011.

Description
And the contest takes off. MePhone4 announces that 14 random contestants were chosen to compete for a 1,000,000 dollar prize! Who will win the first challenge? Who will the team captains be? Find out on the first ever episode of Inanimate Insanity!

Plot
The first episode begins with a disclaimer telling viewers that the following cartoon contains "scenes of actual stupidity", therefore breaking the fourth wall. It goes further by saying that some of the upcoming stunts were performed by animated objects and to not try any of them at home, warning that they can get really messed up. Then, the actual episode begins. MePhone4 greets the viewers and says that he is their host, and introduces the show Inanimate Insanity. He states that the objects will compete for one million dollars in challenges that will be gross, disgusting, and deadly, urging viewers to stay tuned. He says that the team that loses each episode will have to vote off a contestant, and that contestant will leave the team, never to return, ever. MePhone4 then states that it is time for the contestants' first challenge.

After the intro, MePhone4 explains that the first challenge is to jump off a 60- foot cliff and that the first two people to do so would get to pick this season's teams. Knife states that this challenge will be easy, and then MePhone remembers to point out that the contestants must land in clean spring water and not land in elephant feces, which Paper is unaware of the definition, and Knife explains to him, much to Paper's disgust. The first two contestants to land in this "safe zone" are the ones to get to pick this season's teams.

MePhone4 states that if you don't fall into the safe zone, you lose and cannot jump again, ever. He then asks if everyone is ready. Paintbrush begins to ask a question about something, but MePhone interrupts them by starting the challenge and the question is never answered. Pickle states that he has "loads of experience" in jumping off cliffs, and then proceeds to fail within 3 seconds, which MePhone remarks is sad. Paintbrush disagrees and says that it's disgusting.

Balloon decides to jump next, but he forgets that he's made of helium, so he floats slowly down. Pepper then asks Salt to jump together with her. Salt shows reluctance, and then Pepper says that the two of them are "BCFF- Best Condiment Friends Forever", and therefore have to stick together. Salt apologizes to Pepper, saying that there is no way that she is jumping off the cliff. Next, Taco sneaks behind Lightbulb before jumping, and, despite Nickel yelling at her to not do, she kicks Lightbulb, and lands her in the spring water, making her win. Nickel begins to get angry at Taco, saying that it was her fault Lightbulb won, and he kicks her into the elephant feces.

Pepper then jumps and also lands in the elephant feces, leading Salt to jump after her in an effort to "save" her, but she just lands on top of her and crushes her. Marshmallow then jumps and is about to land in the safe zone, but defies gravity and slides over above the feces and lands in it right before she was about to land in the safe zone. MePhone4 states that Marshmallow's "failure to use gravity correctly" eliminated her, but tells them to keep going.

1 hour and 409 seconds of doing nothing and pathetic failure later, MePhone4 starts to get annoyed and states that this challenge should have been done a while ago. He then sees Balloon, close to landing in the safe zone, yet still floating slowly. 20 minutes later, Balloon states "Alright!" as he is now even closer to the safe zone. Eventually, and after some fast-forwarding, Balloon makes it into the water, finally. This means that Balloon and Lightbulb win the first challenge and that they get to pick the teams. Balloon is excited about this, but MePhone4 said that this will have to wait until the next episode, making Balloon furious.

In the end Salt, Pepper, Pickle, and Taco talk in the feces, arguing about what happened when they jumped. Salt states that they didn't have to jump, but Taco yells her famous line, "SOUR CREAM!", although it "doesn't make sense".

Still in the running
""

Characters

 * MePhone4 (debut)
 * Taco
 * Nickel
 * Baseball (debut, non-speaking)
 * Pickle
 * Balloon (debut)
 * Lightbulb (debut, non-speaking)
 * Paper (debut)
 * Knife (debut)
 * Paintbrush (debut)
 * Salt (debut)
 * Pepper (debut)
 * Marshmallow (debut)
 * Bomb (debut, non-speaking)
 * OJ (debut, non-speaking)

Locations

 * Crappy Cliff

Continuity

 * This is the first time...
 * All characters except Taco, Baseball, Nickel, Pickle, Lightbulb, Marshmallow, Bomb and OJ speak.
 * Taco, Baseball, Nickel and Pickle had all spoken previously in "The Stupid Trailer", while the rest merely didn't speak.
 * However, Marshmallow and Taco had spoken at the end of the episode when they're in the feces along with Salt and Pepper.
 * Paintbrush asks a question, which is never answered.
 * In a later episode, "Alternate Reality Show", it's revealed that Paintbrush's question was about a second future version of Lightbulb appearing.
 * Marshmallow fails to use gravity to her advantage.
 * Salt tries to save Pepper.
 * The events of this episode are referenced many times in future episodes.
 * In "Crappy Anniversary", MePhone4 reverts the animation style to represent this episode's style, as well as repeating this challenge.
 * OJ makes reference to his inactivity this episode in the same episode, where he acknowledges that he "stood around and didn't interact with anything".
 * In "Alternate Reality Show", Lightbulb and Test Tube travel back to this episode, interact with various characters and alter time. This might be the sentence that Paintbrush was saying "Well actually, I have a question."

Cultural References

 * This episode's challenge pays homage to the first episode of Total Drama Island, "Not So Happy Campers", in which the contestants also had to jump off a large cliff.
 * Fittingly, MePhone4's voice was done by Christian Potenza, who also voices the host of the Total Drama series, Chris McLean.
 * Additionally, the disclaimer at the beginning of the video references the disclaimer of each Total Drama episodes.
 * When MePhone4 states "one more thing", this is likely a reference to Steve Jobs' famous catchphrase, creator of Apple, of which Meeple and its products, including MePhone4 himself, are spoofing.

Trivia

 * 1 hour and 409 seconds is actually 1 hour, 6 minutes, and 49 seconds.
 * OJ, Bomb, and Baseball are the only contestants in the game at this time that were never in the focus of at least one shot. However, Bomb and Baseball were seen near the edge of the cliff when others were jumping. OJ was seen only once: in the wide shot of all the contestants before the challenge.
 * In this episode, and in "A Lemony Lesson" sub-par animation is used for the whole episode, not counting the trailer.
 * The episode’s thumbnail is one of two thumbnails to use the sub-par animation. The other is Crappy Anniversary.
 * In A Journey Through Memory Lane (Part 1), the Recapper claim that the animation in the first episode sucked.

Transcript
View the episode's transcript here.