A Lemony Lesson/Transcript

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So then I was like, "Yeah," and then she was like, "No way!", and then, I was like, "Yeah way!", and she was like, "Oh my God, like, seriously? No way!", and then I was like, "Yeah girlfriend! Hey!", and then she was like, "Honey, please." You know, I really miss Pepper. It's been like, 1 hour, 27 minutes, aaand 34 seconds since I last saw her.

You counted?

(waving at Pepper) Hey, Pepper!

Salty Salt!

Delightful music plays as they run towards each other in slow motion, until Salt runs into OJ.

Intro plays

So?! I won last time! Where's my prize?! I demand a prize! Now!

Where did that attitude come from? Anyway Balloon, last time, you and Lightbulb jumped into the safe zone before the rest of the contestants, which means that you two get to pick the teams.

OMG, really cool!

(sarcastically) Yeah! Thanks to Taco!

SPRINKLES!!!

So Lightbulb, you can choose first.

How come he gets to choose first?! What about me?

Well, if you remember, Lightbulb fell into the water before you. So he gets to choose first.

Hmm... Nickel! Come over here, you get to be on my team!

Nickel walks to Lightbulb.

You've made a wise decision, Lightbulb! You won't regret it.

Well, I choose Pickle. After his brave cliff dive, I now realize that-

Yeah, yeah. Enough with the 6-hour speeches!

Pickle walks to Balloon.

Yeah! Chosen first?! That's awesome!

Yeah, well, there's a 1st time for everything. And FYI, you were chosen second. *chuckles*

Hmm, Nickel, how 'bout we choose Knife? He's strong, right?

Fine, whatever.

Knife walks to Lightbulb and Nickel.

Yeah! You'd better choose me! Now I don't have to beat you up.

(sarcastically) Whew! That's a relief. I was so​ terrified.

Knife kicks Nickel.

OW!

Hey Balloon, let's choose Taco!

No way! Let's pick someone who's actually useful to the team!

Taco, get over here! You can be on our team!

What?! I didn't agree to that!

Taco jumps over to Balloon's team.

Paintbrush is tall. He can come in handy someday.

Paintbrush is a ​guy?

[walks to them] Yeah!

OJ, buddy! Get over here.

Baseball, get over here! You have to be on my team!

Yeah, I agree, Pepper.

Let's choose Marshmallow!

Oh great, a tiny weak object.

Hey guys! How about we choose Salt? She's cool, right?

No, not really. She's really . Let's choose Bomb! He has lots of "exploding" fun.

*chuckles*

That wasn't funny at all!

Hmm... Paper, or Salt? Which one should we choose?

Paper. He's cool. Plus, I don't feel like listening to salts. *imitates Salt from earlier*

Hurtful!

Hey Salt! That means you get to be on my team now! Come on!

Well... Hmm... Okay!

Okay now, all of the contestants are assigned to teams. So each team, you have 1 minute to pick a team name.

Just because we're so epic, how about Team Epic?

Yeah!

It's perfect!

Okay, you guys are now Team Epic. And Balloon's team, choose a name please.

CHICKEN LEG!!!!!

Ok, Team CHICKEN LEG it is!

WHAT!? NOOOO!!!!!!!

Now that the teams are picked, we can move on to the challenge.

(sarcastically) Finally. About time.

Now back on track. If you noticed, there are two large lemon trees behind all of you.

Hey, I found our tree!

Nickel kicks one of the trees.

Tree 1 Get off my branches, you little turd!

Tree 2 I'm an apple tree so just off.

What the?! Those weren't there three seconds ago.

No, they were not, and I'm talking about the trees over there that DON'T talk. Luckily, we had an app for that. Anyway, you guys have to take the lemons from your tree, and put them in your team's respective baskets. You must work together as a team for this challenge, or obviously, you will fail. The team to have the most lemons in their basket at the end of a three minute time period wins. Got it?

Well actually, I had a question about-

START!

Nickel climbs to the top of Team Epic's tree.

Show off.

Nickel throws down some lemons, which hit Baseball. Paintbrush catches the lemons.

Ooh- ow- OWWWW!!!

Something brown then lands on Baseball.

Sorry dude, I just couldn't hold that one in!

Paintbrush carries the lemons to Team Epic's basket.

Let's use the useless one to our advantage.

Balloon kicks Taco to the top of Team Chickenleg's tree.

(stuttering) Okay, that was kind of harsh.

Who cares? It worked, didn't it? Hurry up, Taco! Give us the lemons!

SOUR CREAM!

(stuttering) OJ... Don't you know? Taco doesn't speak English, only French, and some other words.

We're so doomed!

Paintbrush puts three more lemons into their team basket.

Ughhh! No! COME ON!

Paintbrush and Marshmallow bring in twelve more lemons.

You know, you could be a little nicer to Taco, it's not her fault.

Well, you're the one that chose her, and she's such a .

I'll show you who's a !

Pickle kicks Balloon, sending him flying.

Don't worry Paper, we don't need to compete. I brought my portable DVD player. Let's watch the best show ever!

You mean Desperate Housewives?

Yeah dude!

Knife and Paper are now watching Desperate Housewives.

No Shelley, don't cheat on Matt, he's a nice dude!

It's... so... sad!

Balloon lands in his team's tree.

Whew! Hey, I'm in the tree, but there aren't any lemons in here. No fair! The tree is rigged!

Balloon, nature can't be rigged. It doesn't work that way.

(stuttering) How are there no lemons in our tree?

Twenty seconds left, and it looks like Team Chickenleg is pretty much doomed.

Oh, great. You know what, Taco? This is all your fault! Taco, you suck!

Balloon kicks Taco. She then vomits a bunch of lemons. The score is now 31-32, with Team Epic still in the lead.

What the hell?!

Don't worry guys, we're still in first place, and there's only a couple seconds left.

Taco coughs up two more lemons, bringing Team Chickenleg into the lead with a score of 33-32.

Time's up! And the score is 33 for Team Chickenleg and 32 for Team Epic, so Team Not-So-Epic loses! One of their members is going home today.

Wow guys, you actually lost to Taco? That's really sad.

At least we did something. You just sat there and watched Desperate Housewives. And that show is terrible!

You guys are so eliminated!

Speaking of elimination, and I don't mean my bowel movements, Team Epic, come with me to the elimination area. It's time for you to vote which contestant should leave.

Cut to the elimination area.

All the votes are in, and it's time to see which contestant will leave the game... FOREVER. When I call your name, it means you are safe, and you get to stay for another episode. And for every episode, you will get a little gift when you are safe. This time, we have a hot plate of chocolate chip cookies. So if you get no cookie, you leave the game. Now Nickel, you received no votes against you, so you get to stay for another episode.

MePhone4 throws a cookie to Nickel. He catches it with his feet.

So are Baseball, Lightbulb, and Paintbrush, who also received no votes.

Lightbulb and Paintbrush catch their cookies. Baseball's cookie hits him in the face.

Marshmallow, Knife, and Paper, you all received at least one vote. Marshmallow, with only one vote, you are safe.

Marshmallow catches her cookie.

Knife and Paper, you both received three votes, and are tied. We will have to settle this with a tiebreaker challenge.

And what might that be?

Well, you both are standing on a small platform, suspended over a lake.

Hey, how did we get on...

The first contestant to fall off the platform and into the lake below is eliminated. Oh yeah, and you can't come back. Ever. It's that simple. Go!

You actually think you could beat me up?

Knife slaps Paper, sending him flying. He floats to the pole below and grabs onto it.

Woah, that was close!

Grrrr!

Knife throws a bowling ball onto Paper.

Ow! What the heck, Knife?!

Knife then throws an apple, Taco, and a dolphin onto Paper.

Was that a freaking dolphin?

Bye bye!

Knife pushes a piano off the platform.

Wait, WHA-

The piano lands on Paper, causing him to fall into the lake.

That's it. Paper, you are eliminated. That wraps things up, so tune in next time for another amazing episode of Inanimate Insanity!

Episode 3 Premieres JUNE 1, 2011

Transcripts Season 1 The Crappy Cliff • A Lemony Lesson • The Arena of Death • One-Shot Wonder • The Stacker • A New Stage In The Game • War De Guacamole • Sugar Rush • 4Seeing The Future • The Snowdown • Double Digit Desert • Aquatic Conflict • Crappy Anniversary • Inanimate Smackdown • The Great Escape • The Tile Divide • The Penultimate Poll • Journey Through Memory Lane (Part 1) • Journey Through Memory Lane (Part 2) Season 1 Remastered The Crappy Cliff • A Lemony Lesson • The Arena of Death • One-Shot Wonder • The Stacker • War De Guacamole Season 2 Breaking the Ice • Marsh on Mars • Tri Your Best • Cooking for the Grater Good • A Kick in the Right Direction • Let Er' R.I.P. • Everything's A-OJ • Theft and Battery • Rain On Your Charade • Mazed and Confused • Kick the Bucket • Alternate Reality Show • Mine Your Own Business • Hatching the Plan • Truth or Flare • The Reality of the Situation • Through No Choice of Your Own • Objects in Mirror Season 3 Stranded in Paradise • The Shame of the Name • Snapshot Showdown • The Overthinkers • Tragedy at 60 Feet • Try Not To Laugh Challenge • Best Served Cold • Out of Body Experience • Title TBD • I Am Chocolate! • Pesty Besties • Home Is Where the Heart Is • Friend or Froze • Spring on the Breakfast! • Blue Buried • The Great Bluish Bake Off • The Show Must Go On • A Jury of Your Fears • You Can't Do This Forever Season 4 The Future Is Today! • Cob Mentality • Run the Risk! • Fan the Flames Shorts The Stupid Trailer • Nickel's Tips On Conserving Water • Inanimate Insanity II - Anniversary T-Shirt Contest! • Waffling About • Seas the Day • Inanimate Insanity & BFDI Meet Up! • TWO OF THEM!? - BFDI X Inanimate Insanity 2023 Event • BFDI x Inanimate Insanity - THE PORTAL?! • Inanimate Insanity SEASON 4!? Fan's Fantastic Features The Issues with Tissues • The Participation Trophy • Nickel For Your Thoughts • The Paper Cut Exit Interviews Blueberry • Fan • Lifering • OJ • Box • Tea Kettle • Cabby • Clover • Goo • Test Tube • Paintbrush • Candle • Bot • Yin-Yang • Nickel • Silver Spoon Enanimat Ensanetay Teh Awsum Sammich • The Bow Box Pizza Partay 5 • Tis Cabbage... and sum Pasta Inanimate Answers KNIFE VS THE FANS • BALLOON VS THE POPPER • BOW VS DINOSAUR • APPLE VS SANTA