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OJ's Exit Interview[]
Exit Interview (1)[]
Ame: Hello to our Inanimate Audience. My name is Ame, and this is Inanimate Public Radio's favorite and quite possibly only segment still worth caring about: the exit interview! After every Invitational elimination, you can trust us to pass through the loser into an interview and reflect on their time playing the game. Now, here is an acronym that you might be familiar with! It starts with an O, ends with a J, and... well that's it. Hello! And welcome to our favorite normal guy, OJ.
OJ: Hey, hello! Thank you so much for having me on.
Ame: Hey, OJ, did I spell your name correctly?
OJ: Uh, yeah, you did, Ame. It's, uh, really simple to spell. You did a very good job at that! You know, it actually stands for—
Sponsor[]
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OJ: Whoa, uh, w-what is happening? Exactly?
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Exit Interview (2)[]
Ame: Wow, thank you so much for that wonderful sponsor. I'll be sure to go play that thing right now. Wait, actually, I'm in the middle of an interview... never mind!
OJ: Yea-ah, we were talking about me, until, Lifering kinda...
Ame: Alright, let's get right into it! OJ, what was it like being in a competition again and away from the hotel? What was your takeaway from your experience?
OJ: Well, I definitely didn't expect to be back in the competition again. I don't think anyone expected season three to just—happen! Like this...
Ame: Honestly, I don't think anyone saw that coming.
OJ: No, of course not, and I thought: ooh wow, a nice little getaway from the hotel! Might be a healthy break for me! But no, it just had to be another competition. So yeah, once I realized I was trapped, I had to get my head back into the game again. And now that I've had a bit of experience managing a hotel, I figured, oh hey! This shouldn't be so hard anymore! But, hah, no, I was wrong about that too. I guess a big takeaway for me would be that your experiences don't always prepare you for the next big step in life. Cause—you gotta be ready for the unexpected! Like, running out of towels, or your drone delivery service doesn't accept cash, or, you know, being thrown into another competition against your will again, stuff like that!
Ame: Very relatable content there, OJ. I'm sure that all of our lovely viewers at home will be able to sympathize with your struggles. Anyhoo, being back in the competition meant being around MePhone, and suffering through his endless challenges once again. How did you feel about that? And did his cookies ever change?
OJ: [He sighs.] Yeah, I wasn't too happy about that either, as you can imagine. MePhone's a real pain and caused me enough headaches. I've had enough of him already! I mean, season one? Jumped off a cliff, three times! And what do you know, I'm swept into a new season, and guess what we do?
Ame: Jump off a cliff again—
OJ: We jump off a cliff again! Seriously, this guy has got no chill! But hey, let's just say I reported a little safety concern before I left. I sued him once, I can easily do it again. That one's for you, Thinkers. Oh, and by the way his cookies still probably suck, I won't ever taste them again but once was enough.
Ame: Yuck, sounds gross. Well, it's great to hear you're still looking out for the Thinkers even after you've left. You and Paintbrush in particular had a really powerful dynamic together, wouldn't you say?
OJ: Oh, yeah, for sure. Paintbrush and I were both trying to fit in the Thinkers driver's seat at the same time, so, there was definitely some heat between us, no doubt. Especially near the end...
Ame: Then again, who doesn't have a little bit of heat with Paintbrush?
OJ: [He chuckles.] Yeah. I think all of that brought us a little closer though, you know?
Ame: What about the rest of the team? How do you think they'll be without you?
OJ: Hopefully fine, I think...? I left Paintbrush in charge, but I'm pretty sure they just gave it up, because I heard Yang shout something about destroying the government? So, uh, here's hoping for the best! Yay...
Ame: You sure? You don't seem confident about that.
OJ: Yeah, Yin-Yang's pretty unpredictable, The Floor is... scary, and absolutely everywhere, I-I mean Candle's got a pretty good way of keeping people calm, so, as long as she sticks around, I think the team should be great. So... I wish them all the best! Even Silver. He played the game well, and I don't hold anything against him, other than being a bit of a jerk about it afterwards, that was kinda rude...
Ame: Yeah, your team's a bit... explosive.
OJ: Heh, that's... one word for it.
Ame: But they're all good-hearted people. And you got to know all of them personally.
OJ: Yeah, I couldn't have asked for a better team. They were great.
Ame: Oh, for sure. But let's talk about your elimination. You've gone from the first place winner of Inanimate Insanity season one, to an early boot of season three. And this was the first time you've been eliminated—ever. How did it feel?
OJ: Well, I've gotta say, it felt weird. I've seen so many of my friends be eliminated before, and I've always wondered: what if that had been me? I mean, it's so difficult to drop everything you've done and worked so hard for, and be forced to walk away. You know, the hotel and the competition—it's no different. But at the same time, I was... kind of relieved. I didn't have to worry about the craziness of the game once I finished season one, and boy, I really did not need any of that in my life again. So, I think the timing worked out.
Ame: Actually, let's flip this around for a sec. Imagine you weren't eliminated, OJ, and instead you actually won again. What would you have done with the money?
OJ: Oh, yeah, I've thought about that a lot. I mean, I've already got the money to make a hotel and then some, but, with even more, it'd be nice to expand a bit. Paradise has got a lot of open space, and I could totally see an OJ resort fitting quite nicely there. Big spacious villas, towel service, beachside grill—agh, man, it would've been so cool.
Ame: If you'd won, I wish you'd given me a free room or something, because that sounds awesome.
OJ: Well, aw, shucks, I lost.
Ame: This resort sounds so nice and relaxing. And speaking of, since you're such a high-strung person yourself, we'd love to know: throughout all the chaos in the hotel, how do you like to relax?
OJ: Hmm... Honestly I'm most happy when I'm productive—being on my feet, and fixing problems left and right, so—the chaos doesn't bother me too much. But, once I've dusted off my hands and sit down after a long day of fixing problems and making everyone happy, it's nice to kick back and cool off in the walk-in fridge. I'll listen to cool music, close my eyes, and just unwind. It's my chilling time.
Ame: That sounds awesome. Chill vibes in a chill room, what more could a juice want?
OJ: I don't know, maybe another... mm... million... mm... dollars?
Ame: Now, last question. This one's from me personally and I definitely didn't ask anyone to put this question in: who do you think will win Inanimate Insanity Invitational?
OJ: Hmm... I've gotta bring it back to Paintbrush. I know I've talked about them so much, but, they've got some great skills and lots of determination. And not to mention, they know how to twirl it! That's gonna bring them far, no doubt! I think they just need to keep a handle on their temper. But, that could intimidate players from going after them, so... who knows? Maybe it'll come in handy some day.
Ame: Heh, I see what you did there.
OJ: Yeah, it's a fun callback to—
Ame: The uh, handle on their temper?
OJ: Oh that's—not at all what I was going for. But, hey, yeah, cool! They do have a handle!
Ame: I'm funny. Anyway, that's a wrap on today's exit interview!
OJ: Wow, well, thank you so much, that was pretty chill.
Ame: Alright, alright, I know that I said that you had the chill vibes, but, let's be honest. I'm the one with the chillest vibes here.
OJ: Um, n-no, I don't—I wouldn't say that...
Ame: Hey, hey, OJ. It's okay to admit that I'm cool.
OJ: Are we really doing this? Are we really saying who's cooler after I went through that whole thing about me sitting in a fridge—that—come on, man. That-that was the coolest thing I've ever said. Come on. I'm cool.
Ame: No, actually, I'm the cooler one, sorry!
Outro[]
Ame: Anyways, thank you very much to the not-cool OJ for taking the time to answer our questions, which were written up by the Inanimate Insanity patrons. You can sign up on the Inanimate Insanity Patreon and have the opportunity to ask questions for our exit interviews. This is Ame, thanks for watching!