| Episode | Gallery | Transcript |
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(Paintbrush is laying on a beach chair on a cruise-ship)
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Ah, here comes paradi-
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(A crashing sound is heard)
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Dai-ai-aise!
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Woah! Neato to the third degree Yin-Yang! But uh, what are you fishing for?
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Not fishing for friends, so get lost!
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Yang! We are fishing for our ticket.
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...Why would it be in the water?
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I THREW IT IN THERE!
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Yep, okay-
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Heyyy, you buckaroos! Could you please, I don't know... zip your lips for more than 2 seconds... thanks!
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(After a few seconds, a "DING" sound is heard.)
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Hyah!
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(Yin-Yang fishes up Box from the water, and water splashes all over Paintbrush.)
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The motherload! Heh, oh Box! Who taught you how to swim?
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(Yin and Test Tube laugh while Paintbrush is angry.)
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(Nickel walks up to Paintbrush)
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Hang in there Paintbrush, as much as you're enjoying the company, we're almost there.
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Good, I'm excited to *pulls a seashell out of their hair* finally catch a break! I'm not the biggest fan of Spoiled Lemon's hits, but I can't wait to see them live at the resort!
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(singing) All I wanna do, is go to a party! Yep, my personal favorite still. Even if it got snubbed at the Groscers! And these VIP tickets were a huge score, Nickel! They're usually so overpriced!
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*Nervously* Heh, yeah, scalpers raisin' those prices! They're the worst! ..heheheh. Um, I, um- didn't get the tickets by the way.
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Oh. Well, score revoked. I thought one of you knew the band?
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Nah.
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Yes, haha! Oh, no I did not get them, I am not nice.
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Even Box's generosity wasn't the catalyst... hmm, fascinating... Um, HEY, BALLOON-
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*Sliding in* I wouldn't waste my breath. He's not really known for his... (through teeth) authenticity.
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*Picks up mini-wich* Oh, lone mini-wich... all of your conflicting layers kept together by a lone pick. I just want to be you... keeping it together, even in the rough times! *Eats the mini-wich*
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Your sacrifice was a learning tool.
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*To himself* Tools... the repairs... (sigh)... who will fold the towels....
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Uhh... OJ?
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Ah! Oh- Sorry, it's just the hotel manager in me. I haven't been comfortable with this whole... vay-cay... vah-caaaay.. vacaaaah-
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Vacation?
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Ugh, even the word sounds wrong coming from other people.
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*Confused* Then- why did you invite us all on an all-expenses paid trip?
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Heh, Balloon, if I organized this trip, the attendee list would be radically different.
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(Balloon looks at OJ annoyedly with an eyebrow raised.)
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Oh- uh- oh, um, well- what I meant, was-
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*A loud bang noise occurs*
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Ah! What was that?
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Ah, yes- w-what was that?
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(To Yin-Yang and Test tube) Ugh, again? I thought that was you guys!
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Give me more credit, I'm quite gentle!
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Oh, spare us.
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Uh, guys? I think this equation has an answer!
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(The camera motions towards the steering wheel of the boat with no one there to handle it.)
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It's alive!? Lemme see a face! We're going to a resort! Right, uh- Boaty?
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(Unimpressed) Boaty?
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(The boat begins to shake and speed up.)
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Now, this equation may as well be divided by zero- there's no solution! *Screen is locked in a freeze-frame* Oh, wait, actually, there'd be an infinite amount of solutions. Oh, good, okay.
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(The screen un-freezes to everyone screaming in fear.)
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(Narrating through the screaming) What's going to happen next? You're not going to want to miss this one!
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(The screaming stops, everyone is looking at Fan, unimpressed.)
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Sorry, this helps me in traumatic times.
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(The screaming continues as the boat slides off screen, as a crash is heard and the screen turns black.)
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[Crash!]
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(The screen pans towards a deserted island with the crew all groaning on the beach.)
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*cough* *wheeze* Is this the end for our castaways? Many secrets and more to be revealed.. *cough* NEXT SEASON! (Fan collapses on the ground) Ahhhh... That was nice.
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(Starts clapping) BRAVO! BRAVO! (her arm breaks) ohhhhh... OW! OW! OWWWW!!!!
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I appreciate the devotion to the craft... BUT... WE'RE... STRANDED!
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[Overreactful] Not only stranded... We're stranded with Balloon!
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[Annoyed] OH COME ON!
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*Turns to Box* Oh, no, Box, don't cry, shh, c'mon it's- it's gonna be okay!
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(To Nickel) After EVERYTHING-
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(Everyone starts to bicker, excluding OJ, who's in the middle of everyone arguing)
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EVERYONE, PLEASE!
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(Everyone stops arguing to listen.)
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For ONCE, we're actually not on a reality show! So can we PLEASE stop the drama, for like, two seconds?
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(Two seconds pass, and a ding is heard.)
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Aaand time! Great rehearsal everyone, you've outdone yourselves!
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(Everyone gasps at the sight of MePhone4.)
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Yeah, called it.
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*Angry* MePhone, get out of here! We're on a VIP tour! *Holds up the ticket*
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Yeah, the Very Indecent Promise. And sure, it may be a doctored ticket, but it was for a great cause! After all, what would I have done without my all-star cast of favorites?
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(Everyone is surprised when MePhone says 'favorites')
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That's right, the viewers have spoken, and they want you all in!
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(Balloon and Nickel gasp.)
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*In awe* I'm... a FAVORITE?
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*Annoyed* Wow, looks like he doctored more than just the tickets.
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*Flustered* Wow... me? Aha... a... favorite? Ahahahha-
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(The camera switches to a moment similar to Survivor/Total Drama confessionals, where Paintbrush is by themselves talking to the camera in the "Calm Down Cabana".)
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Well, I'd like to thank the Academy. First the million, then the Groscers! *Suddenly looks around* By the way, WHERE AM I?
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(The camera switches back to the beach and the crew.)
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Uh, no. No, no, no, no, no. The hotel won't survive a vaaaa-caaa-tion without me! So, sayonara! *Starts walking away*
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Sure thing. Hope you polished your swimming skills, it's only about a hundred miles or so.
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(The camera motions towards the half-sunken, broken, and on-fire boat.)
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*Falls to the sand* NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
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*In the Calm Down Cabana* ...Fine.
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Wait a second, you're not even done with the other season!
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Eh, whatever, multitasking is kind of my strong suit.
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Wow! A one in eight shot of winning the grand prize?! The odds have never been greater a victory!
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(The camera pans towards the ruined boat as it half-explodes, turning to a charred color)
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[Offscreen] NO! BOATY!
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(A figure flies up out of the wreckage, landing on the sand.)
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Haha! That was awesome! DO IT AGAIN!
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(MePhone, Balloon and OJ look at Bow in terror.)
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Now it's one in SEVEN!
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Um, heh... No. It'd be one in nine with you here. Oh, also... You're not DEAD? That's interesting.
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Haha! no, I'm not dead! Ha. Wha- wh... No, right? I'm not dead. No, right? Yeah! no! I'm not dead! Haha... No.
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*Shocked* What? How are you even- I sent your invitation as a joke!
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*Shrugs* I dunno.
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Ugh, well, okay. With nine of you, that's 9 episodes, right? What are we, a limited mini-series? Puh-lease. This season, Fans versus Favorites. You're the Favorites...
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(MePhone walks up to a curtain hiding something as he pulls on a string, as they half-open, revealing another character.)
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Wow, I win? Oh my gosh!
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What? No, agh!
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Well, yup, here they are. Meet the Fans!
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A fan? A fan of what?
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Why, I never! This introduction was simply a disaster! I'd say perhaps a reshoot is in order?
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No amount of reshoots can save us now...it's over.
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Don't think like that! This situation's like- a melting ice-cream cone, yah! Sometimes you get it on your pants and you're like, "Oh no, is the store closed? What if they're out of pants!?"
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...now I'm sad.
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You made him sad, Goo.
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*In the Calm Down Cabana* Yeah, sometimes my analogies don't "stick" with people, but at least an awkward introduction is a memorable one, right?
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*Sarcastically* Okay, we're off to a great start. You're all probably wondering what teams you're on-
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Well, assuming you're seasoned to repetition, which is evident from a third season, I have on file here that you randomized the teams in the most recent season premiere. So this is just a guess, but it has been properly educated.
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Ooh, I like this one!
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AHEM!
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*MePhone clicks a button on a remote, and paint bombs explode over the contestants, coloring them in three different colors.*
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Consider the teams randomized. It was Cabby's idea, everyone, and that stuff doesn't come out easy.
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Oh, no, blue? The color of defeat? It's over everybody, it's over. It's all over. Thanks, Cabby.
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You can't cover me in this shmutz, I'm an antique!
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Everyone okay? I can perform CPR!
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*In the Calm Down Cabana* I should've referred to my MePhone4 file prior to making that claim! The first item on his profile... he kind of sucks.
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Yes, while you all weren't looking, I strapped paint bombs to all your backs! The color you're covered in is your team color.
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*Team Blue, Team Pink and Team Yellow all gather together.*
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Fan and Bow
Yay, Pink Team!
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Didn't I already win?
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*The camera pans over to Clover, holding her un-detonated paint bomb in her hand.*
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Is that why my paint thingy never went off?
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Huh?
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*MePhone clicks the paint-bomb detonator button repeatedly, yet Clover's paint bomb never goes off.*
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...Well, that was supposed to be pink.
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Ohhh!
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*She looks over to the Pink Team, who all cheer.*
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*The camera turns to the Yellow Team.*
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Sorry, MePhone, I'm sensing an imbalance in the universe here... Something awry.
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Yeah, we're down a member.
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Hey, uh-
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OH- AGH- (hopping from one foot to the next)
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Watch where you step, mate.
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Oh, sorry!
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Doesn't feel great to be stepped all over, yeah?
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Oh, but THIS can have a face? What kind of sense does that-?!
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Alright, with our teams assembled, it's time for the first challenge! This is Inanimate Insanity, seasoooon...!
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*The intro plays.*
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(After the intro finishes, the camera shows that all the contestants are gathered in front of MePhone4.)
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Okay, so, your first challenge is to jump off this 60-foot-cliff.
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(Camera pans to the top of the cliff.)
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*Distraught* Sixty feet!? Has everyone gone through their required diving courses? Proper form is crucial with these heights!
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Oh...- absolutely! (Motions to camera to stop recording)
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(The camera blacks out for a second, then returns to Tea Kettle in the Calm Down Cabana.)
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Okay hun, you are NOT about to throw me 60 feet to my demise. But I guess having a walking life preserver on your team doesn't hurt.
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(The camera returns to the cliff, showing a black-and-white representation of what MePhone is saying (below).)
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At the bottom of the cliff, you'll find a safety tube that'll bring you straight to the finish line. If you miss, you'll hit the quicksand and re-emerge at the top. First two teams to have all their members across the finish line will win immunity. Last place will send one of its team members packing... so, go!
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(The contestants are still unmoving.)
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No- like, the challenge is on. Go now.
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(Camera pans to the Yellow Team.)
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*Does a small twirl* Okay, everyone! I think we'll need to organize a game plan!
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Agreed, OJ, thanks for that twirl. It was lovely! Now, check out mine!
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(Paintbrush does a twirl in front of OJ.)
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Woahhh! Hold the phone, that was brilliant. We get style points for the dives, right?
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Yeah! Maybe we can practice a routine before-
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Dumb idiots! Just jump, okay!? Bye now!
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(Yang kicks OJ and Paintbrush off the cliff, and they both scream on their way down. Yin Yang also jumps down, and they all land in the tube, leading the three to the finish line.)
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And half the Yellow Team has stuck the landing! Well organized!
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*In the Calm Down Cabana* I do not appreciate indecision. (Meanwhile, Yin looks at them(selves) with a glare.)
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(Back at the cliff) All right, recruits! So, remember: Back 90 degrees, arms straight, and- h u a h!
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(Lifering dives off the cliff, landing in the quicksand.)
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Wow, that form looked fierce! Let me try!
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(Clover falls backwards off the cliff, landing in the tube, ending up at the finish line.)
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Uh, oh- guys, I can't sink! It's literally my entire purpose! You're gonna need to weigh me down!
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You got it, teamie!
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(Balloon jumps off, but floats down ever so slowly.)
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Oh, come on...
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(The camera motions towards Box, before turning to Nickel.)
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Oh, the things I'll do for money. Agh- Uh, Balloon, catch me!
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Nickel jumps, and Balloon catches him. Tea Kettle also jumps, and Nickel catches her.
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Mama's gotcha!
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(They float down faster now, as the camera turns towards the Pink Team. Test Tube is measuring Cabby with a measuring tape.)
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Hmm... let's see...
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*Slightly Smug*I can tell you my internal dimensions if that's what you're trying to calculate.
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Being told the information? Huh, what- I- What fun is that?
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Victory isn't always fun. And 28 by 8-
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Ah, no, no, don't spoil it for her. But, uh- based on what you know, y'think we can... 'take the cab', eh?
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Cabby smiles, opening up one of her drawers for the team to get in.)
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Knock yourselves out.
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(The Pink Team cheers and hops in.)
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*From inside Cabby* Woah, where are we? This isn't Narnia!
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(The camera pans back to where the rest of Yellow Team are, the top of the cliff.)
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Savagely hurling myself off a pile of dirt!? Ugh, well, this is unpleasant... b-leugh!
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You're destined for a leap of faith... come along.
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I have no faith in YOU, though- oh, woAGH!
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(Candle grabs Spoon's hand and they both fall off the cliff, landing in the finish line tube.)
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*He notices he still hasn't gotten to the finish* Oh, sorry.
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(Floor sinks his face into the ground, and re-appears at the finish line.)
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Sorry I'm late, yeah?
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Aaand Team Yellow wins immunity!
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*Surprised* Wow! Wow... that, was- uhm- PREPOSTEROUS!
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(The camera returns to the bored Blue Team excluding Blueberry, on top of Lifering to weigh him down.)
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Look, I'm sorry, but y'know, I'm industry grade!
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Uh, yeah- a Grade A DOOFUS! (Sigh) Blueberry, we need more weight, c'mon!
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(Back up at the clifftop) It's no use, this always happens. We're destined to lose.
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With that attitude, sure. But I know deep down that you're a FIGHTER, Blueberry! And if you harness that and channel it into PASSION then... well... then there's nothing you can't do.
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...no. We're goners.
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*rolling off the cliff* WOOHOO!
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(Cabby lands in the tube, emerging at the finish line. The rest of the Pink Team hops out.)
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And Cabby files a victory for Team Pink! Blue Team...
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(The camera pans towards the still half-sunken Lifering and the rest of the Blue Team.)
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One of you will be voted out first.
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Are you joking?! You've sunk us all!
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Hey, I mean, at least he's still sinking here with us.
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*At Calm Down Cabana* I have to say, that cab ride was really bumpy. And they didn't even have one of those little TVs! So, zero stars! Oh- but we won. So one star! Coolness!
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(The camera is back to where Nickel and Box are. Balloon walks on screen.)
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Hey, guys! Wait up- I wanted to-
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I'll stop you right there, Balloon. There's no need to in-authentically approach me. Today meant nothing.
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No, it did! You put your team first! And now, I'm asking you to continue that. Help us keep things together... us returning players.
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Hnnmmrggh we DID have two massive duds today, aaurgh- I'll need to consult my- associate about this.
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(Nickel turns to Box.)
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*ominous sounds*
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*shocked* For real? But- which one of the two?
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*ominous sounds*
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*In the Calm Down Cabana* (Sigh), Looks like I'm bunking with the devil tonight. But you know what they say, 'keep your enemies closer'! ... That, and Box is quite convincing.
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(The screen fades to black, and returns to where MePhone and the losing team are, the elimination area.)
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Aah, the first person voted out. A distinction no one wants, but debatably all of you earned. I mean, from moment one, Nickel and Balloon wouldn't stop bickering!
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Okay, that was pretty one-sided, like, c'mon.
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Lifering, your inability to sink, sunk the challenge for your entire team!
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Okay, I admit my diving form could've been stronger.
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Oh, please, he's not talking about that!
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But at least he even attempted. Blueberry, looking at you, pal!
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Notice how no one has gone after Box? This is my life... what's the use...
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*silence*
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You're absolutely right! Anyways, you've cast all your votes, and the contestant with the most votes will be knocked out of the competition. I'll read the votes.
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(MePhone's screen lights up to see who's voted for who.)
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First vote... Lifering!
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(Lifering looks scared, while Tea Kettle looks to the camera, smug.)
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...Blueberry.
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(Blueberry looks emotionless, while Nickel looks smug.)
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...Nickel. One vote Lifering, one vote Blueberry, one vote Nickel.
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(The camera flickers towards each contestant mentioned, each looking alarmed, yet Nickel looks slightly angry and confused. The camera rests on Box for a moment, hinting to the fact that maybe Box voted for Nickel [somehow])
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...Lifering. Two votes Lifering.
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(Lifering looks very scared. Tea Kettle and Balloon smile, hinting the fact they both voted for him.)
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Blueberry. Two votes Lifering, two votes Blueberry, one vote Nickel. One vote left. The first contestant knocked out...
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(All the contestants mentioned look on with suspense.)
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...is Blueberry. It's time for your ride home.
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(Blueberry gets off his seat and progresses towards MePhone, while Lifering looks relieved.)
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Oh, thank you! The real lifesavers over here!
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(Everyone looks slightly surprised and confused.)
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*Cheerfully* Blueberry, you've been knocked out!
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(MePhone pulls on a curtain string, revealing the Fist Thingy)
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Glad I got that thing fixed. Anything to add before your departure?
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What's the use... Nothing I say matters... nothing matters...
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Couldn't have said it better myself.
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(MePhone presses the button, the fist punches Blueberry, and sends him flying.
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And with Blueberry gone, can the Blue Team recover after losing it's bluest member? Find out next time on Inanimate Insanity Invitational!
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(The screen fades to black, returning to an unknown island. Blueberry lands there.)
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Good... leave me here... just leave me be...
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(A walkie-talkie strapped to a tree starts to beep and talk.)
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Welcome to Indefinite Island! Congratulations! Yooou've been eliminated. Get ready to stay here for a while... IF you want another chance. (Fast) No guarantees have been made as of recording this recording, restrictions may apply.
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(The walkie-talkie cuts off, as the focus turns back to Blueberry.)
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This place seems nice. *Smiles*
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(End)
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