what if the bottom 9 were put in III instead of the top 9 voted (Episode 1)

This idea has been itching my brain since I made the post so I'm going to do a full what-if series on it, starting with episode 1

https://inanimateinsanity.fandom.com/f/p/4400000000000305955

Cold Open

Opening to Salt and Pepper relaxing on their beach chairs

Aaahhh, isn't this great, Pepper?

I know, right? A suntan and *then* a V.I.P. tour for Spoiled Lemon?

[Offscreen] AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

The camera pans over to where we see Tissues has just sneezed right on Soap.

GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF, GET IT OOOFFFF!!!

Sooorrryyy... It's my condishawn.

You know, have you ever tried blowing into your arm?

No, Pickle, don't you see? *SNIFF* My condishawn was worsened by sneezing into the arm. AACHOOO!

Pickle dodges it just in time, but it flies right into Bomb's face

Bomb, you've been pretty *SNOTTY* today, what gives? HAHAH!

Nice one!

[muffled stuttering] Apple, stop it. It doesn't hit the same when it isn't from Cheesy.

Heeyy, can you guys, like, I don't know... SHUT UP?!

Yeah, we're trying to enjoy our tanning time.

Plastic Bubble Madness

Don't you see?! We have a sick person on this boat! We need to quarantine him!

Tissues is put in a plastic bubble by Soap

AAACHOOO! [the bubble is immediately filled with snot]

Bomb, you're covered! You need to be quarantined as well!

The same happens to Bomb.

Didn't you get sneezed on as well?

OF COURSE! [she puts herself in a plastic bubble] But wait... we've all been in proximity to the condishawn!

Ugh, there is no way you're going to put *me* in a plastic bubble for this whole V.I.P. tour.

Camera zooms out to show them all in plastic bubbles.

Woah! Watch what I can do...

Apple rolls her bubble into Pickle

Oh no you don't!

Pickle retaliates, and suddenly the whole boat becomes a giant pinball machine until it capsizes.

Great! Now we're stranded in the middle of the ocean!

Uhhh, no. The shore is like 10 feet away.

Oh.

The contestants roll their plastic bubbles onto the shore. MePhone4 deflates their bubbles.

The Reveal

Aaand time! Great rehearsal, everyone, you've outdone yourselves!

the underdogs gasp

Ugh, MePhone, like, go away...

Yeah! Can't you see we're on, like, a V.I.P. tour...?

[swiping Pepper's ticket] Yeah, the *V*ery *I*ndecent *P*romise. And sure, it may be a doctored ticket, but it was for a great cause. After all, what would I have done without my all-star cast of underdogs? That's right, the viewers have spoken and they wanted you all in the least!

[left] The least?! [right] Ouch.

I know, right? And since I felt so pitiful for you eight, I decided to invite you guys instead!

You had to have doctored MORE than the tickets, everyone knows I'm the fan favorite out of the whole cast!

Yeah, keep dreaming.

So I'm stranded... On an island... full of diseases we might not even know about nor have any cure for?! I'M OUT OF HERE!!!!

Sure thing, hope you polished your swimming skills! Only a hundred or so miles to go.

I am dead

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

[confessional] Fine.

W-w-w-w-wait, i-i-isn't s-s-s-s-season t-t-two still g-g-g-g-going?

Whatever, multitasking is kind of my strong suit.

Wait, hold on, you said the *nine* people with the least votes?

Yeah.

And there are eight of us...

Oh! Well, I did invite Dough, but that was just as a joke. He's definitely not coming.

Hey guys.

Pickle, MePhone4 and Apple gasp

But you're... you're... you're dead!

No, I'm not, I'm standing right here, dumbo. Use your eyes for once. Anyways, is there any bears on this island?

The Fans

Ugh, well, okay. With nine of you, that's nine episodes? What are we, a limited mini-series? Puh-lease. This season, underdogs vs fans. You're the favorites...

MePhone4 walks up to a curtain and he pulls it. It gets jammed, and only Clover is visible.

Wow, I win? Oh my gosh.

What? No! [he keeps trying to pull the curtains all the way] UGH, AGH!

The curtains fall down, finally showcasing the new contestants.

Well yup, here they are. Meet the fans!

A fan? A fan of what?

Why I never! This introduction was simply a disaster. I'd say, perhaps, a reshoot is in order?

No amount of reshoots can save us now... It's over.

Don't think like that! This situation's like... a melting ice cream cone, yeah! Sometimes it gets on your pants and you're thinking, "Oh no! Is the store closed? WHAT IF THEY'RE OUT OF PANTS?!"

Now I'm sad.

You made him sad, Goo.

[confessional] Yeah, sometimes my analogies don't "stick" with everyone, but at least an awkward introduction is a memorable one, right?

Team Picking

Okay, we're off to a great start... You're all probably wondering what teams you'll be on.

Well, assuming you're seasoned to repetition, which is evident from a third season, I have on file here that you randomized the team in the most recent season premiere. So this is only a guess, but it has been properly educated.

What a nerd.

AHEM.

MePhone4 pushes a button, paint explodes on the contestants

Consider the teams randomized. It was all Cabby's idea, everybody. And that stuff doesn't come out easy.

Whatever color of paint splashed on them

Oh no blue? The color of defeat? It's over, it's all over. Thanks, Cabby.

You can't cover me in this shmutz, I'm an antique!

Everyone okay? I can perform CPR!

Oooo, Salty Salt, do you think I look good in blue?

Ehhhh...

[confessional] I should've referred to my MePhone4 file prior to making that claim. The first item on his profile... he kind of sucks.

Yes, while you all weren't looking, I strapped paint bombs to your backs! The color you're covered in is your team color.

Teams Forming

Yay! Pink team!

Didn't I already win? Is that why my paint thingy never went off?

Huh? [he repeatedly clicks the button] Well, that was supposed to be pink.

Oooh!

The pink team cheers, Cabby writes in her files. Cut to the yellow team.

Sorry, MePhone, I'm sensing an imbalance in the universe here... something awry...

Wait... we're down a member!

Hey! H-

AAHH!

Watch where you step, mate.

S-Sorry...

Doesn't feel great to be stepped all over, yeah?

All right, with our teams assembled, it's time for the first challenge. This is Inanimate Insanity, seasooooooooon!

Intro plays

First Challenge

Okay, so your first challenge will be to jump off this 60-foot cliff!

Sixty feet?! Has everyone gone through their required diving courses?! Proper form is crucial with these heights.

Oh, absolutely! [signals to cut the cameras]

[confessional] Well, since we're veterans, we have experience with this exact challenge.

[confessional] Mhm.

[confessional] But, I mean, I'm still like really scared of heights!

[confessional] OMG yeah, I still get nightmares from season 1's cliff dive...

At the bottom of the cliff, you'll find a safety tube that will bring you straight to the finish line. If you miss, you'll hit the quicksand and re-emerge at the top. First two teams to have all their members across the finish line will win immunity. Last place will send one of its players packing... so go!

Cliff Jumping

Don't worry guys, I have loads of experience in jumping off cliffs.

His file says otherwise...

Pickle jumps off the cliff, landing nowhere near the pipe.

AGH! [opens eyes] Oh, phew, it's not elephant dung this time.

Pickle sinks into the quicksand this time and then pops up back at the cliff

Wait for some direction next time!

Called it!

Wait, where'd you get all those folders?

None of your business...

Oh, ok... WAIT! I have a great idea! What if we use Cabby as a cab?

All right, hop in.

Everyone hops inside Cabby, but Tissues is thrown out immediately

Sorry, I can't risk getting the "condishawn."

Hold on! [hops out of Cabby] I have a plan. You guys go ahead.

All right. [Cabby jumps off the cliff and into the pipe]

Thanks to Apple's smart strategy, over half of the pink team has already completed the challenge!